Grow Up

A couple of days ago, I have started reading a book called Dynamic People Skills by Dexter Yager – one of the greatest leaders of the modern world. The way this book is written completely amazes me. It takes me much longer to go through the chapters just because I am making so many notes as I go through the book. In one of the first chapters, Dexter talks about the idea of adulthood. He says that many people are adults in terms of age but behave like children. He then looks at how this impacts the world we live in and how you can personally “grow up.” This is what I want to talk about in this article. Let’s hop in!

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Dexter says that as an immature person, you have some characteristics you might not even be aware of. Naturally, if you want to grow up, you need to step out of these limitations. Here are some of the limitations he talks about (you can look for the rest of them in his book).

Living in The Immediate

Teenagers make impulsive decisions, they are pretty much driven by constant gratification. Dexter says that they live in the “right here, right now” without really considering the consequences of their actions. The idea of instant gratification keeps them hungry for the instant feeling of pleasure, which is also connected to another characteristic of adolescents. They are dominated by emotions. Simply put, when your feelings control what you do, your thinking is limited. Think back, have you bought something just because you “felt like it?” That is the reason why most people have issues with credit debt – they have not grown up and they allow their emotions to affect their thinking on the spot.

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Short on Discipline

Discipline is a struggle for many. Can you discipline yourself to wake up early? Can you discipline yourself to eat healthily? Can you discipline yourself to work out regularly? Many of these areas are major struggles for most people around us. Dexter says that teenagers take discipline as a drag and a burden. Adults understand that discipline is what frees you. It frees you to succeed. Nobody else will do it for you, you need to discipline yourself to grow up.

Limited Knowledge without Knowledge of The Limits

Teenagers are limited in the knowledge of life, sex, people and experience. However, they are not aware of these limitations. They are not aware of the fact that they don’t know what they don’t know. One of the steps to maturity is understanding and accepting the fact that you do not know everything. People don’t grow up, because they think that they have already grown up and experienced everything not facing the reality.

 

Operating from A Sentimentality Base – Not A Reality Base

This is something I can relate to and I need to work on. Imagining too many things without seeing reality. A great example is this story from Dexter’s book. One of his friends, Ron (the co-author of the book), told him a story from his college times. He saw a very beautiful lady at the campus and he “got a crush” on her. He never spoke to her, she lived more than 400 miles away. Yet he developed this image of great romance in his mind. He decided that he would marry her and went to see her at her distanced home. When he got there, reality slapped him in his face. She was already dating someone else and she didn’t even know who Ron was. He learned a crucial lesson at that moment. He couldn’t possibly think that he would marry her, he never even properly spoke to her!

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Identity Sensitive

This is something pretty much every teenager falls into and most people never escape. People hunger for acceptance. They always want to fit in, they want to be liked by everyone. If you ask me what is the reason why most people give up on their dreams and goals? This is it. In order to fit into something, we call “the trend,” people absolutely disregard their own direction in life. Adults understand that not everyone has the same values and principles and that if they want to achieve greatness, they need to follow their own path, not someone else’s path.

3 Tips To Fire Up Your Mornings

In the recent half a year or so, I have been developing this little morning cycle that helps me boost my overall daily performance and focus. It is something that took me some time to figure out but after finding what works the best for me, I am now able to wake up and kick my day off pretty much habitually (without using up much of my conscious energy). I’ve learned to understand and utilize the power of a morning routine and my aim for this article is to give you 3 tips (or steps if you may) you can build your morning routine around.

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#1 – Meditation, Gratefulness & Visualization

In my personal morning routine, I have developed a habit of waking up and going directly into positive thoughts about the upcoming day. When I open my eyes I instantly lead my mind to positivity. I aim to think something along the lines of – “I can achieve whatever I set my mind to, I am making it happen, I’ve got this, I will win over this day.” This supports my feeling of motivation and determination for the day. Directly after that, I go into meditation. This I do in two different ways, either I sit down calmly and meditate, or I have also started practicing some active meditation such as Tai-chi. The purpose of this is to approach your subconscious mind that you can utilize in the next part of this, which can be visualization. Daily visualization of your goals and dreams in the present tense is something incredibly beneficial for the long run (law of attraction and other reasons).

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#2 – Reading

The second tip I would say is very useful to utilize in your morning routine is setting up 30-60 minutes purely for reading a book in the area of your interest. This does not only stimulate your brain, but it can be the number 1 way you can use to outperform pretty much anyone. An average American reads 1 book a year, that is 10 books in 10 years. Developing the habit of reading 30-60 minutes every morning will lead to you finishing 3-5 books a month. This will turn into about 40-50 books a year, which turns into 400-500 books in 10 years. Do you think you can outperform someone who read 10 books as opposed to your 500?

 

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#3 – Exercise

Your mornings are the most important time of your day. Why? Because you have the mental energy to finish very heavy tasks, which you might not be able to execute as well later in the day. I always finish my morning routine by setting out to my workout. Simply put, I get the hardest thing done first. Another huge benefit of morning workouts is that your body will feel energized for the rest of the day (not even mentioning the wave of endorphins after you finish your workout). Furthermore, your body will thank you for keeping it healthy on a daily basis 🙂

You might also find it useful waking up a bit earlier so you have more time to put into these activities. You really don’t need to sleep 8-9 hours. 7 is more than enough! Go to sleep on time and give yourself a strong power-up in the morning!

Progress Booster 101

One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned in the last couple of years of constant interaction with different people, from different cultures, coming from different places of the world is that we live in a world where constant gratification is something engraved into our brains. Everyone wants to succeed and everyone wants to succeed now. Many people don’t want to go through the process of dying but want to be up in heaven right now. Constant gratification is something that has been ruining many people’s mindset and very likely yours as well. It is something I am personally battling every day as well. Developing the mindset of delayed gratification is incredibly hard in the modern world. A question that comes up quite often is – For how long do I have to delay? The answer to that question is – as long as you need to. It depends on your specific case. However, I can give you a way of significantly shortening that amount of time. Let’s take a look at how we can do that.

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How Do We Progress?

We are naturally programmed for adaptation. Thanks to our brain, it is very simple for us to adapt to external conditions. What is the process of learning? It is a process of adaptation. I personally went through (and am still going through) 3 different types of curriculums – public, private and university. I studied in a public school in Central Europe, a private school in China and a university in the UK. How did I manage to go through that? I adapted. This is something I have understood when I graduated from high school in Beijing. It is also something I have been practicing in sports throughout my entire life and that has allowed me to do so well in school. I adapted. I messed up, reflected, adjusted and tried again. This process repeated many times in a row simply led to my adaptation to the requirements for me to succeed in any area of my life. This is how we learn, this is how we grow. So how do you boost your progress? How do you steepen your learning curve?

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The Ultimate Booster of Your Progress

Bearing in mind the learning and adaptation process I have described, how can you utilize its understanding to your advantage? How do you progress faster? You simply have to go through that cycle more often. In very simple terms, you try more often, you fail more often, you adjust more often and you try again more often. It is as simple as that. Fail more and you will learn more. The first step for most of us is to get rid of the fear of failing. This is something that has been programmed into our minds by our education system. We are taught that F, F, F, A is still a fail. Why? In my eyes, you have figured it out at the end, thus you know how to do it. How come you’re still failing? This is something that school doesn’t teach you, but life hopefully will. The second step is to find a good way of reflecting on your failures so you can adjust in a proper way. That will cut the learning curve even steeper. Now, let’s buckle up and fail forwards!

 

5 Rules for A Life of 100+

We are all very busy people. Busy with our studies, with our jobs, busy browsing on social media, busy watching Netflix or busy building our dreams. Whatever it is, modern society puts you in a position where you have absolutely no time left for yourself. It is your job to understand this and to create that time. The time for solitude, the time for meditation, the time for peace and also the time to pay attention to your health. More than 50 million Americans are considered obese and many millions of them suffer from something called mortal obesity. What does that mean? That means that their life is threatened by the condition they’re in as it can lead to many diseases often connected with heart problems. Is this a problem? Absolutely. How do you expect someone to make their vision become a reality when they’re struggling with their own health? How do you expect someone to live the life they want to live when they can’t even handle their own health? In this article, I will give you 5 rules you can utilize in your daily diet to keep yourself going for the big 100 and above.

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The picture above represents obesity rates in Australia in June 2018

#1 Rewire Your Thinking about Food

Many people are stuck with the ideology that food should bring you pleasure and happiness. They think about the taste and the pleasure it brings them. As human beings, we are programmed to shift from pain to pleasure, thus food can often serve as a motivator. This is a fundamentally flawed method of thinking because food should serve as a fuel for our body. Start thinking about your body as a car. Depending on the quality of the fuel you use, it will either work for a long time or it will break down in a couple of years. Feed your body healthy, light foods and start looking for pleasure in your long-term vision!

#2 Eat The Right Foods

This might sound too complex to execute, but it really isn’t. It isn’t that hard to look up where to go to eat out, is it? In the same way, it isn’t hard to look up how you should structure your diet based on the results you want to see. Do you want to lose weight? Do you want to gain weight? Do you want to strengthen your body? Do you want more energy? All the materials for you to learn what you need to do are out there. All you need to do is be smart about it and look for reliable sources.

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#3 See The 3 Poisons? Run!

The three white poisons are salt, sugar and flour. The modern mainstream diet contains foods that are literally soaked in sugar and salt. Try looking at the packagings of the foods you buy. Try to find a ham that isn’t oversalted. Try to find a yogurt that is not oversweetened. It is a challenge in some superstores. Another issue is white flour that is included in foods like breads, rolls, pastries of all kinds, bagels and donuts. All of these are filled with carbs that will make you fat. Do make further research about how specifically do these 3 poisons hurt your health and remember, look for the long-run impacts!

#4 Excercise as much as You Can!

Exercise is not only beneficial for athletes. Your body is begging you to start exercising! It won’t only allow you to go easier on your diet, but it will help your body develop more energy, become more efficient with it and strengthen your stamina. There is also research saying that a morning run leads to the release of endorphins that make you feel better than if you eat something you really like. Looking for a pleasure? Better start running!

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#5 Drink Lots Of Water

Lastly, you need to be hydrated properly throughout the day. As I mentioned above, many of us are too busy to look out for these little things. Well, if you looked out for them, you wouldn’t have to be so busy because your productivity will burst through the ceiling! You need approximately two full quarts of water throughout the day to maintain the proper level of hydration in your body. Instead of sipping some water here and there, develop a habit of drinking at least 1 glass of water every hour. 

 

Use these 5 rules to bump up your health and performance. In the long run, you will see a huge, huge difference. You will not understand how can the people around you be so tired all the time. And you will hit that 100 years mark. It is not a matter of coincidence, it is a matter of design and consistency.

3 Steps to Success in Continuous Learning

As you can probably tell by now, we’re all about self-development and empowerment of others here at The Real Life Education. Self-development and personal growth has been viewed by many as a school of thought that has been growing in popularity in the last couple of years. It has been getting more and more attention as people have started understanding its true power. What I want to give you in this article are simple 3 steps you should focus on as you start engaging in this journey of growth and continuous learning. Write them down somewhere in your notebook and think about how you can apply these 3 steps in the area of your interest.

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Step 1: Arise in The Morning and Read 30-60 Minutes in The Area of Your Interest

This step is incredibly important. Why? Because it will help you in more than just one single way. Firstly, it will help you start your day productively. You will feel amazing after your reading session in the morning. You will also feel super ahead as most people are sleeping and you’re already putting in the work to grow yourself. Additionally, if you read 30-60 minutes each day, this will add up to about one book per week. The average American reads less than one book per year. If you read one book per week, this will add up to about 50 books each year. As it happens, to earn a Ph.D. from a major university requires the reading and synthesis into a dissertation of about 40 to 50 books (Million Dollar Habits). If you develop this habit and stick to it for long enough, there is no way you won’t be able to outperform anyone around you. All you need to do is look at the greater picture. This is something called The Compound Effect (also a very good book by the way). In 5 years, you will have read about 250 books – exactly 245 more than an average American. In 10 years, it will be 500 books – 490 books more than an average American. What a boost!!

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Step 2: Develop The Habit of Attending Every Possible Seminar You Can

The second step you should take is to start your research. Start looking up events close to the place where you stay. Seminars are amazing as they allow you to put yourself in a room full of people who are heading in the same direction. They are an amazing place to learn from the best as well as to network, create connections and grow with others. They are also very practical because you usually get to speak to the speaker after the seminar. This makes them more engaging both in terms of creating relationships and gaining knowledge and expertise in your area of interest. There are many, many more benefits that can be specific to the seminars you attend. Get proactive!

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Step 3: Listen to Audios Whenever You Can

The last, but not the least important step is listening to podcasts as often as possible. Podcasts allow you to learn on the move. In the commute, when cooking, walking your dog, exercising, etc. It is one of the most effective ways of learning. Podcasts connect you with an expert in the area of your interest and allow you to listen to that person’s experiences, tips, and tricks. These audios also help you get back on the positive note of your day. Listening to successful people on a daily basis will not only build your mindset but also expand your vision as you understand that what they did is possible. Look them up and start listening!!

One very important tip to remember is carrying a little notebook or using your phone to make notes. Always, always, always make notes. Review them and pick the steps you can utilize to grow.