5 Laws Of Stratospheric Success

It is natural for us, as humans, to always search for shortcuts. We always seek the faster track, we always seek the secret to success. In this article, I’ll talk about the 5 Laws Of Stratospheric Success from the book The Go-Giver. I highly recommend that you give this book a read because it is a mindset shifter, but it’s a really quick read. I personally have read this book multiple times, because it is so valuable as well as so much fun to read. It is written in the form of a novel, so you can actually identify with the main character and understand his situation that might be very much relatable to your situation at the moment. As I have already mentioned, it is a very short read. For those of you who are faster readers, you’ll probably finish the book in less than 2-3 hours. However, these 3 hours can change the way you see success. Now, let’s look at some of the value bombs from the book!

 

The Law Of Value

According to the first law, our true worth is determined by how much more we give in value than we take in payment. This is very much applicable in the business world, but also in your personal life. As I have mentioned in one of our articles where I talk about some strategies to improve your relationships, people should leave you happier than they were when they came. This goes for any situation. You want to give in value as much as you can without expecting much in return. When you give, you also attract. This is the true power of giving. Give as much as you can and don’t expect much in return and you’ll be surprised how you’ll start attracting awesomeness into your life (in any form you wish).

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The Law Of Compensation

This law states that your income is determined by how many people you serve and how well you serve them. This should be a no-brainer. However, there are many who look to gain from people. There are many who look to serve others only when it benefits them. It is said that it is our nature to be self-centred and “rational” when it comes to making choices. However, many great economists like Richard Thaler who focus on the question of rationality and human beings argue that we are actually not as rational as we thought. For more info about this specific area, take a look into the book called The Nudge. At the end of the day, whether it is natural or not doesn’t matter. The bottom line is, the more people you serve and the better you serve them, the higher your income will be and the better your life will be.

The Law Of Influence

Through this law, the authors of the book argue that your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first. I strongly believe that real success does not come from materialistic things. It comes from within and from the number of people you’ve helped to live the life they want to live. In other words, you need to focus on the interests of others, help them reach their goals and you will gain influence, a following and you will reach the top of the Maslow’s pyramid of needs and wants. The true definition of success is the number of people you have helped live a better life. The greatest leaders are so great because they serve others greatly.

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The Law Of Authenticity

The most valuable gift you have to offer is yourself, period. I always talk about focusing on yourself first, growing yourself first. If you make it happen within, without will be simple. If you learn to grow yourself and if you understand that you are capable of anything you set your mind to, you will nail this law. When people ask, what is it that you have to offer? Let me tell you, the most valuable thing you have to offer is YOU.

The Law Of Receptivity

The final law of success from this book states that the key to effective giving is to stay open to receiving. You are there to give, but so are other people. There is a universal cycle that runs with no stopping. Don’t break it. In order for all the other laws to work, you also have to be willing to receive. Don’t be ashamed of receiving the value others are offering to you. Don’t break the cycle of giving and receiving.

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The Unacknowledged Reality

We live in a world where it’s sometimes hard to see reality as it is. This is due to many reasons, such as our curricular systems, culture or the “general truths” that are become less and less true when you look at them closely. One of these “truths” is that your IQ determines how successful you are as it allows you to study better, get better marks and thus get a better job. To make my position clear and straightforward, that is simply not true. In this article, I want to talk about the importance of our emotional intelligence (EQ) and how it provides us with enormous benefits in many areas of life.

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What Is Emotional Intelligence?

EQ is something that most people ignore, which might be the greatest mistake of their life. The physical source of our EQ is the communication between our emotional and rational “brains.” Our brains are hardwired to give our emotion an upper hand. However rational you are, if you don’t understand your emotions, you are in a great disadvantage in every area of your life. According to the book Emotional Intelligence 2.0, most people with an average IQ, but a high EQ outperform those with high IQ and lower EQ. This is because good decisions require far more than factual knowledge. They are made using self-knowledge and emotional mastery when they’re needed most. Ever since we’re young, we’re taught rationality, which essentially means that we’re taught to grow our IQ. But IQ is actually not very likely to grow during our lives anyways. What we completely ignore is our EQ, which has a huge potential as it is something that can be developed (as opposed to IQ).

Emotions

Our emotions are derivations of five core feelings: happiness, sadness, anger, fear, and shame. It is a fact that these 5 emotions are the core influencers of our decisions as our first reaction to an event is always an emotional one. When you learn to understand how you can control your emotions, you’ll also understand how your emotions affect your performance, how you can control and break the transition between emotional states or how you can influence others through your emotional expressions. Learn about your emotions and a whole new world of possibilities will unfold in front of your own eyes.

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So How Does Knowing My EQ Help Me?

If you’re still wondering why should you care, let me give you some numbers. According to the book, EQ accounts for 58% of performance in all jobs. This means that most of your tasks are based on something you can choose to develop or to ignore. Which way is the correct one is up to your choice. The link between EQ and earnings is so direct that every point increase in EQ adds $1,300 to an annual salary. Further, EQ is the single strongest driver of leadership and excellence. Still think that you can afford to ignore your EQ? 

Factors Of EQ

Your EQ consists of 2 fundamental areas – personal competence and social competence. Personal competence includes self-awareness and self-management. Self-awareness is very much your ability to accurately perceive your own emotions at the moment and understand your tendencies across situations. Your self-management is your ability to use your awareness of your emotions to stay flexible and direct your behaviour positively. Based on these 2 factors, you can very effectively control your own personal emotions and their influence on your behaviour. The other side of the coin, social competence, consists of social awareness and relationship management. Social awareness is your ability to accurately pick up on emotions in other people and understand what is really going on with them. Relationship management is your ability to use your awareness of your own emotions and those of others to manage interactions successfully. You can see that these two factors help you control and affect your environment, the people around you. Focus on these 4 specific areas of your EQ and you will see a huge boost in your general life success.

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Being Alone At Times Is Not As Bad As You Thought

In fact, I would argue that it can be positive. When I have asked about what areas you would like me to cover, I have got some questions about loneliness, which is what I decided to dedicate this article to. There is quite a lot of people who get depressed and anxious because they feel like they are too lonely. They feel like they don’t have many people around. I have been through this experience myself with the difference that I brought this on myself. It was the time when I realised that most people in my life are simply not the kind of people I want to stay around. This happened because I finally understood how important and how influential our associations can be. I have spent a lot of time alone, focusing on personal growth and actively seeking like-minded people. Even though I was alone, I knew that there are people who will support me in every situation. They might not have been with me physically, but I felt their presence inside. Although I was alone for most of the time, I never felt lonely. This was also because I understood that I was going through a process of growth and development and that I would eventually attract like-minded people into my life. In this article, I want to talk about why being alone and being lonely is not the same thing and about how being alone can actually benefit us.

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I Am Alone All The Time…

Saying I know how you feel is an understatement. As I have said above, I have experienced the same feeling. When I moved from China to the UK many things in my life changed. I left all the people I knew, I went through a relationship crises followed by a break up with the girl I loved and that all happened in the time span of a few months. Although I might have gone through some hardships, looking back at that time now provides me with many important lessons I would have not learned if that wouldn’t have happened. I understood a lot about how a relationship should work (in my eyes) and I have learned a lot of stuff about myself I did not even realise I didn’t know before. Even though things were pretty hectic, I was able to get up and start running again (metaphorically). All of this learning that has happened in the last half a year or so would have never happened if it wasn’t for that hardship and if it wasn’t for me staying alone for most of my day. The “alone time” truly provided me with an incredible opportunity to learn. I was able to understand the meaning of fighting the battle within, rather than the battle without. This experience has shaped me and continues to shape me into the person I am becoming. It taught me how to be happy from within, it helped me learn about what I really want in life and what I really value in people.

The reason why I am pouring out my struggles and my learnings here is to show you that although you might feel like you’re stuck now, there is a way out that can actually turn this experience into a huge learning for yourself.

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This Is On You!

Before I get into how I utilised my “alone time,” I want to make sure that you understand that staying alone and feeling lonely are two separate things. When you are alone, you are physically on your own, but you are mentally aware of the fact that there are people who love you and who support you no matter what – be that your parents, your friends or in some cases you. Feeling lonely is a completely different case. When you feel lonely, you have consciously put your subconscious mind into the state where you practically believe that there is nobody around you, not even you, who believes in you and who cares. This is a practical result of your own thinking. Nothing has caused this other than your own perception of the way things are. If you want to change the way you think about this issue, you need to change your words and your thoughts. That is what I did. I understood that I can control how I feel and what I think and shifted my thoughts from negativity and “loneliness” to positivity, blessings, love, gratitude and happiness.

It’s Your Time!

When you spend a lot of time alone, you either give up and turn into short-term self-satisfying procrastinator who is always depressed, or you stand up on your feet and build yourself up. If you try to look at your situation from an objective perspective, being alone can sometimes actually help. All the attention that you would have given to others can now be redirected to you. That can be good, but it can also ruin your confidence. This comes down to whether you compare yourself to some idealised model out there, or whether your only point of comparison is you yesterday. I understood that it was all about me, about how I thought and about how I made myself feel. That was the time I understood that I had something amazing in my hands. I understood the purity of life, the colossal power hidden inside. I understood that the happiest people are the people who love themselves first and I understood that those people are also the ones who can share the purest kind of love with others. I learned probably the most important lesson of my life. I learned that we all possess the power to influence what is within, which then allows us to influence what is without.

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Birds of A Feather Flock Together

“Birds of the same feather flock together.” This saying is known by many but understood only by few. The importance of our associations and the people we “hang around” with and spend most of our time with is one of the two major influences we have in our lives, the second one being the books we read. In this article, I will be focusing exactly on that, our associations. I will talk about why they’re important to our life, how they affect us and also how we can control whether our associations influence us positively or negatively. This is one of the most crucial influences you will have in your life, it can be the factor determining your victory, or your doom and I strongly suggest that you do take a proper interest in this area of knowing if you want to take full control your life.

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Why Should I care?

The associations you create in your life, a.k.a. the people you spend your time with, play a very important role in your personal development. Your associations are probably the single most important influence you have in your life. Ever since you were born, you’ve been around people. Each and every one of these people has left some kind of experience, some kind of impression with you. This could have had a short or a long-term effect on your personality and on your perspective on reality. Considering the fact that nowadays you spend more time with your classmates than with your parents, you can see why people get into trouble when they find the wrong group of friends, or in other words, associate with the wrong people. On the other hand, spending more time with dreamers can help you tremendously in developing a dream of your own. You are the average of the 5 people you spend most of your time with.

How Come? I Have Never Felt Any Influence…

Here’s the thing. You often don’t consciously realise that you are being influenced by others, but you are. This, like most of the long term influences in your life, works on the bases of regularity. You can meet a negative person a couple of times and feel no difference. However, after some time, you will start complaining as well, because that’s what you get used to if you spend more time with that person. When I am around specific people regularly, I can sense that my vocabulary changes. When I speak to the people who swear, I end up swearing more often. When I leave that association and hang around my business partners and my mentors more, I speak less vulgarly and more to the point. This is all because of the influence these people have on me. Think about this kind of situations in your life and try to analyse what effect they have left with you.

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So What Should I Do About This?

What you want to do with this, or more specifically who you want to associate with really depends on your situation and your direction. Do you want to become more positive? Search for positive people and spend less time with the negative individuals around you. Do you want to become financially free? Search for the people who are heading in the same direction. Best case scenario, you connect with someone who is already there and who is willing to help you, mentor you to get there as well in your own way. Use all your energy on this, because it will change everything. Remember, this is not only about adding new people into your life, but also about reducing the time spent with the people who affect you negatively. That is the second side of the coin. Think carefully about who you spend most of your time with and where are these people heading. If you’re heading in a similar direction (positivity and ambition-wise), then you’re on the right track.

 

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The Winner Mindset

We often hear about the few of us who have succeeded greatly in their lives. Faces of the people like Warren Buffet, Jeff Bezos, Mark Zuckerberg or Gary Vaynerchuk fill our social media feeds on a daily bases. What is so special about these legendary humans? How have they managed to succeed in such a great manner? They have something the average human doesn’t have. They have the winner mindset. Many will argue that they have been born with such great potential. But the last time I’ve checked, newborns don’t understand how investments and technology work. It is learned. The winner mindset can be developed, the winner skills can be learned and practised. So how come most don’t succeed? That is because we’re brought up to be average. We’re brought up to follow the herd and again, the last time I checked 99% of the people around you fit into that traditional average frame very well. The difference is that these successful individuals decided to step up and developed something you can call a winner mindset. In this article, I will talk about some of the major components of this mindset and how these components affect our success.

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Mindset Vs Skillset

Before I get to the qualities of a winner mindset that I think have to be developed in order to reach any greater success, I want to draw an important distinction between a mindset and a skillset. In short, a mindset is a set of attitudes you have towards life situations. I have recently written an article about how attitude affects our lives, so make sure to give it a read to understand attitudes more in-depth. You can check it out here. On the contrary, a skillset is more specific to what you do and to how you do it. It essentially gives you the ability to cope with problems. If you took a further look into the difference between these two concepts and the way they can be developed, mindset would be connected to mentorship, while skillset to coaching.

Winner Mindset

In the next part of this article, I will talk about some of the winner qualities I have personally learned about and then experienced first-hand. These are also some of the qualities I am focusing on personally, as I believe they can take you very far.

#1 The winner can see what others can’t before others can

This is a very fundamental quality of every winner and more specifically of every leader out there. The unique ability to cast a strong vision and then stick to it in the long-term. Whenever I talk about success and success principles, I always begin with the why, with the long-term direction, with the purpose that leads your decisions and ultimately directs your action on every step of the way. This is also the major difference between a winner and an average guy. The winner has a purpose that allows him to persist and consistently push for his goals, while the average person bases his or her decisions on the momentary satisfaction. Here, the next quality comes into the game.

#2 The winner understands and pursues the concept of delayed gratification

Every winner out there consciously or subconsciously pursues the concept of delayed gratification. The winner understands that he is in for the long game. Everything the winner does now is for the sake of the long term. The winner fights the battle now in order to live the life he wants to live later. In life, we all have a battle to fight. It is up to each and every one of us whether we take on the challenge now, or whether we keep postponing it until we are not able to win it. The winner understands this and fights now.

#3 The winner understands that he does not know everything and thus aims to grow through every experience

Every winner has this quality people usually refer to as the growth mindset. I have written an article on this topic quite a while ago. You can check it out here.

#4 The winner refuses to equate self-worth with rejection

This is a major problem with many people in our society. When they get rejected, they start questioning their ability and themselves in general. Am I good enough? Am I the problem? The winner understands that rejection is a part of the journey. The winner understands that he needs to fail his or her way to success. In the winner’s mind, rejection is not connected to his ability or his value, it is an opportunity to grow.

#5 The winner keeps his integrity no matter what

Methods change and develop, but values and principles always stay consistent. This rule is the core quality of every winner. Every person who reaches any greater level of success understands that integrity is who he or she is and that integrity can take the person a long way. This is also one of the greatest reasons why most winners obtain a huge following along the way. They have values and principles that they promote through everything they do and people love that.

These are only a few of the qualities every winner has. There is so much more to talk about, but these few concepts are a good starting point. Incorporate and customize these qualities in your life and observe the change.

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