Set Yourself Up For Success

Most of us know what kind of movies they like, some of us know what subject in school they enjoy, few of us know what they want to do as a job and most of us don’t know how they want to live. This is a major flaw in modern society. It is clearly a fault of the tradition. We are led to think about the “what” rather than about the “why“. This is something that cripples us in the long run and makes most people regret not having done what they’ve dreamed of doing in their lives. This flaw has a further crippling consequence. We are unaware of where we are and what we should do next with our time. Why do you think many teenagers end up drunk every weekend? Do you think they would still do that if they understood their direction and the reason why they’re taking that path? In this article, I will be talking about a few steps you can take to set yourself up for success in the long run.

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Step #1 Find Your Direction

As I have mentioned many, many times before, it is not important what you do, but why you do it. Why do you go to school? Why do you go to uni? Why do you workout? Why do you wake up early? Why do you procrastinate? Why do you read books? Why do you not read books? Begin with the end in mind. Become outcome-focused, not process focused. Why? Because processed focus people never actually achieve what they want. Even more, they don’t understand what they want, they don’t understand the outcome. They only understand the process. If you know that you have to go to university, but you don’t know why, how are you going to feel? Will you study just to “get it done” or to actually learn and grow, so that you can utilise that knowledge in the long run?

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Step #2 Identify Where You Are

The second step is slightly easier than the first one, but its biggest challenge is your subjectivity. To understand how far we are from the desired outcome, we need to set up some framework that will make it easier for us to clear up some confusions created by the subjectivity of this matter. What I would suggest is setting up a scale from 1 to 10. 10 would be that goal of yours, maybe the life that you want to live. It is “the why” you came up with. Now it is important to take some time and think about how far you are from where you want to be. The scale helps you to specify it for your reference. You can set up some points where you’ll be stepping up one number. If your dream is to live the life of a judge, not for the sake of being one, but for the sake of imposing justice, one of your steps could be graduating from a law school. Which leads me to the third step…

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Step #3 The How

After you have figured out how far you are from your goal, from the final point, you should start planning out the “how” in terms of how you are planning to get there. What are the steps you have to undergo to achieve that goal? What are the experiences and learnings you have to go through to live that life? How will you grow to your success? This is the time for you to find the right platform that will deliver the results for you. In order to do this, a very helpful aspect of your focus should be a person. A someone who is closer to that 10 than you are or a someone who is already past it. Pursue them and learn from them. That will cut your path much shorter than it would be otherwise.

Finally, understand that your 10 is not a static point. It is very likely that as you grow and as you start approaching it, it will expand. It will shift and you will find yourself sitting on a 5 even though you were on a 7 before. Why? Because you have grown, you have expanded your dream and your 10 became an 8. This should not disappoint you, it should excite you. It is a sign of you developing a growth mindset – understanding that there is always some space for growth and improvement.

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The Overlooked Power of Praise

The present generations have grown up in the world, where we are told what we shouldn’t do, how we shouldn’t behave or how negative our lives are. Hearing all these negative phrases and criticisms inevitably leads to something we call negative conditioning of our mind. We are lead to negativity by default. This is one of the reasons we tend to overlook something all of us can do, we tend to overlook the good stuff in others. We look for the negatives in people, we criticise. What we do very rarely is praise.  In this article, I want to focus on the power of praise, its effect on our relationships and more importantly on our own mind.

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The Negative Conditioning

As I mentioned in the introduction, most of us have been brought up in a negative environment. We go through our youth learning what is not meant to be done, what can never be achieved and what we need to focus on, although it might be something we really do not enjoy. The way modern society is set up is very alarming. In school, in the workplace, you are criticised whenever you do something that is outside of the norm (in a bad way). You are led to think inside the box, to follow the tradition and to keep your head down. Try to look back, how often have you been criticised for making a mistake? How often have you been praised for performing well? Most of us tend to focus on the negatives to “improve” our behaviour, but we fail to praise the positive, which is actually the factor that influences us the most.

The Power of Praise

So what should we change? According to the books Whale Done and How to Win Friends and Influence People, we need to start looking for the good people around us do and we should start bringing it up more often. Look for the good instead of the bad. Look for the small accomplishments you can praise people for and praise them! It is very unnatural for us since that is not how we have been taught to behave, but it brings miracles. How do you feel when someone tells you how amazingly you’ve completed your task? It feels great. And even more, it makes you want to improve and grow! Praise supports growth and improvement, thus it is a very good idea to praise even slight improvement because it will multiply the original result in the future. Additionally, the more positive you look for, the more positive you will see. The more positive you will see, the more positive you will accept into your life. The more positive you will accept into your life, the more positive you will attract. It is simple, the more you praise, the more will people want to be around you and the more you will want to be around yourself.

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Regarding the practical side of this concept, I have discussed different kinds of responses in this article. In short, there are different kinds of responses. You either ignore, you criticise, you praise or you redirect. The most common response is ignorance. The most useful responses are positive and redirection. Why redirection? Because it allows you to take the negative and turn it into praise.

Look for the good in people and in their actions. The greatest challenge for most of us will not be reducing criticism but strengthening praise. We love to ignore the positive, now we have to take a step forward and start praising it.

3 Kinds Of Education You Should Know About

We have all gone through some sort of process of education in our lives. Most of us went through elementary schools, many of us through middle and high schools and some of us through university systems. A group of us could actually say that they have been through some steps of this process multiple times. When we finish this massive 20+ year process, we are supposed to be “educated” and we are supposed to start “living the life.” What does that actually mean? How would you define “educated?” In this article, I will focus on the 3 major kinds of education we should all be aware of and I’ll make an argument around which kind we should focus on and why.

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3 Faces Of Education

Throughout our lives, most of us get to experience 3 major educational streams. The first one being the academic education that is meant to “prepare” us for life. The second stream follows after academic education. This stream focuses on framing us into the employee our bosses would prefer. In short, this education is meant to make you “successful” in the workplace. The 3rd stream, which we are advocates of in The Real Life Education, is the real-life education itself. This stream focuses on growing you as a person. You are the centre of this stream and you will benefit from utilising it.

Academic Education

Academic education is considered as the “traditional” stream of education. You go through your elementary school, middle school, high school, university and finally you get a job. This stream is sold to us as the education that “prepares us for life.” The only issue is that the level of standardisation has reached unbelievably stupid levels and “the life” stands for “the average life of an employee.” Millions of kids go through this stream every decade. They are all taught in a very similar way, they are taught very similar stuff and they are assessed on the same scale as well. How can this be effective? Furthermore, academic education that is supposedly there to “prepare you for life” actually does very poorly in that. Academic education teaches you to do what you’re told. It teaches you to be a generalist and to follow the crowd. When you enter real life, you will learn how useless this is in terms of any greater success. Just to give you a perspective, according to Shana Lebowitz from, the average GPA of 700 studied US billionaires was only 2.9 (out of 4). Which is considered a very low standard – people usually get around 3-3.5. The academically smarter kids go over that limit all the way to 4. I personally was a valedictorian in my high school back in Beijing with a GPA of 4. What use is that going to be in the future? Not much.

Professional Education

Professional education is directly connected to the academic stream. When you go to uni, you are meant to look for internships and work experiences because that is the starting point. When you graduate and (hopefully) find a job, you will be constantly told what to do, how to do it, when to do it, etc… You will see yourself following orders from 9 to 5. You will be framed into an obedient employee. Most people live this life and some enjoy it. Would you? I wouldn’t.

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Life Education

Life education is something that has changed my life. When I got in touch with my current mentors, I have started discovering a brand new world of knowledge. I started learning about myself. I started understanding how my mind works, how my body works and more importantly, how other people work. As my mentor once said, technical skills will take you only so far, but people skills will make the world your playground. This is also the mission of The Real Life Education. We are here to spread the word of life education, we are here to ensure that you have an efficient source of this stream and that you can benefit to the maximum extent and maybe one day become one of those millionaires I’ve mentioned above. (Hint: You will not make it with only the first two streams. How many employee millionaires who have the time to live how they want do you know?). Focus on this stream and you will see a huge change in your life. You will find yourself becoming happier and happier and you will find yourslef gradually outperforming everyone around you.

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The Decision Filter

On average, we make about 40 000 decisions every day. These decisions include both conscious and subconscious decisions, most of them being subconscious. What makes things much more complicated for us is the incredible amount of influences that affect us throughout this decision-making process. For instance, deciding whether to buy a coffee from Starbucks or to save money on that one purchase could be quite troublesome. How come? Because we are quite easily influenced by factors like social media, visual adds on the streets or simply our friends who buy their coffee on daily bases, thus presenting it to us as a common action to take. Without realising that buying a coffee for 5$ on a daily bases leads to an expense a little over 1,800$ in a year, we follow the “standard” and suffer the consequences with everyone else. What I want to talk about today is a very simple decision filter you can use pretty much every time you’re making a decision. This will help you evaluate your decisions based on your own values and principles.

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Step #1 Define Your Values & Priorities

To structure your filter effectively, you first need to define its functions. You need to define the variables that will affect whether our decision passes through the filter or whether it gets stuck inside it. The two core variables that we’ll focus on are your values/principles and your priorities.


To define your values, take a piece of paper, sit down in a quiet place and think about what kind of person you would like to be. I’d suggest focusing on 10-20 core values that can range from honesty, respect to others all the way to being responsible and professional. All these values and hundreds of others will help you define one of the layers of your filter.


As Warren Buffet said, the best way to define your priorities is to think of 20 goals or achievements you’d like to reach within your lifetime. List them down, rank them from the most important one as number 1 to the least important one as number 20. Once you’ve ranked them, take the 3 from the top and disregard the rest.

Step #2 Three Core Questions

Now that you have defined your variables in your filter, you can structure the filter itself. The filter is constructed from 3-5 check-in questions that allow you to make it clear to your mind whether the decision should pass through into the action taking stage or whether it should be stopped.

Question #1

This question should involve your priorities. The question should look somewhat like this – Does this decision bring me closer to becoming…./reaching….. or does it keep me where I am or take me further away from it? For instance, if your #1 priority was to become financially free, you could ask yourself – Does buying a coffee every day in Starbucks get me closer to my financial freedom or does it keep me at the same spot, or even worse, away from it?

Question #2

Question #2 should focus on your principles and values. You should ask yourself something like – Does this action violate my values and principles? For instance, if you wanted to be very honest and you were facing a decision whether you want to tell your partner that you’ve cracked her favourite vase, what do you think you should do? Ask – Does not telling my partner about cracking her vase make me a dishonest person? The answer to that would be – yes, so it follows that the action you should take is telling her about it.

Question #3

Question number 3 is a little reassurance after the first 2 questions. If you buying a coffee in Starbucks doesn’t pass one of the first 2 questions, question 3 could help you find a “middle way.” The question should look somehow like this – Since this action violates my values/priorities, how can I do it so that it wouldn’t? For instance, If you really want to buy coffee, maybe you should buy a cheaper one, or maybe you should brew your own. If there is an appointment that hasn’t passed your filter due to the prioritisation of different tasks, can you reschedule it? Can you leave earlier? Can you make it shorter?

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Overall, this filter serves as a tool to make your life simpler. Using this will allow you to make decisions based on your own view, based on your own values, principles and priorities. It is also very customisable, so take it, play with it and exploit it as much as you can! Much love!

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The #1 Killer Or The #1 Booster Of Success

In the last half year, I’ve been listening to a lot of positive audio talks created by successful entrepreneurs who have not only succeeded themselves but who also raised numerous leaders who could follow in their footsteps. The question I used to ask myself quite often is: “What do these guys and gals have in common?” You might be asking yourself the same question as well, which is the reason why I decided to write about this topic today. In this article, I want to talk about probably one of the most important concepts that can either kill your success or take it to another level. Let’s talk self-image today!

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What Is It?

Self-image is something we all need to develop in our lives for multiple purposes. It is something that not only gives you the confidence to take action, but it gives you the confidence to even start thinking about the action you are taking. Self-image is the level of your self-believe at a given time. The way you see yourself ultimately determines the extent to which you can dream, thus self-esteem can serve as a booster to your success, or it can completely kill it.

Why is this so beautiful? Because you decide. It might sound like a cliché, but you are the one who ultimately decides how you see yourself. You’re the one who decides how others can influence your self-image. Do you care about what others think about you? If so, you’re giving out a tremendous portion of the power that should be only yours. You are giving out the power to scale your dream.

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How Can I Take Control?

As I mentioned in the introduction, every person who has succeeded to a greater extent has a high level of self-image. They believe that they are amazing and that they can achieve whatever goal they set for themselves. This is the ultimate characteristic of successful people. So what are the methods these people used to achieve that level of self-esteem?

The Power Of The Subconscious Mind, The Law Of Attraction

They spoke their goals into reality. This is the best way to boost your self-image. Autosuggestion and thought control. Autosuggestion is a technique that allows you to control your subconscious mind and thus your thoughts and feelings over the long-term. If you want to read more on this topic, check out this article where I talk about this method in detail. Now, don’t misunderstand – when I talk about thought control, I don’t mean some crazy 1984 telescreen mind manipulation, what I mean is taking control of your own thoughts. It means listening to your feelings that signalise whether what you’re thinking is positive or negative and cutting negative thoughts by shifting your focus on the positive things in your life. Take control!

The Power Of External Influence

You are affected by other people’s opinions whether you like it or not. You can only control the extent of that influence. Make sure you surround yourself with the people who raise your self-image, who are supportive and who are looking to grow alongside you. I have published an article on the topic of external influences a while ago. In that article, I talk about how your external environment affects your state of mind and your growth.

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Scale Your Success!

Utilise the fact that you now understand what your self-image can do for you. Work on growing yourself, speak your thoughts into reality, improve the way you see yourself and see your goals growing as well. The better your self-image, the greater your dreams. The greater your dreams, the greater your growth and achievement. Fight for yourself, you deserve it!

Thanks for reading, have a lovely wonderful rest of the weekend!

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